Mode-st men!

(This was a cover story - have edited out certain parts here - that I wrote for the paper)

Men. “They undress more than they dress,” we giggled. I know I just broke the rule of girly talk there by letting you in on a line we shared, but it’s that very line from where the idea of this piece sprang out. While it’s true men like undressing (I won’t tread further on that path), it’s truer that men have their own particular and peculiar style of dressing.
I remember my editor asking me once, “Why do you’ll leave us poor guys out of fashion stories?” That actually serves as food for thought. Nine out of 10 times, we limit our fashion talk to women. We dialled model Viraf Patel, former Grasim Mr India, and in the midst of our convo, we brought up our view of the ‘women-fashion’ relation being stronger than the ‘men-fashion’ bond. His instant rejoinder was, “It goes like this. Men are as fashion conscious as they can ‘afford’ to be. Women, on the other hand, are as fashion conscious as they need to be.” An explanation follows, “If a guy can afford a brand like Armani, he’ll buy it. If he can’t, too bad. He’ll settle for a lesser brand. But, but, but, a woman will fret and make sure she has her Louis Vuitton bag.” Wise words there!
But, truth is, men are and can be just as glamorous, fashionable and stylish, or then just as strange, uncoordinated and tacky as some women, when it comes to fashion sense. If you look at our model and actor brigade, they’re trendsetters. Even a Govinda, who can carry off a yellow shirt with red pants, will find several to emulate him. And, that emulation stirs the fashion-‘conscience’ in men.
There are some with designer dreams, and then there are others who’re happy with what they can buy off the shelf at boutiques, malls or other stores lining shopping streets. Most men tone their look down. While women would l-o-v-e to flaunt designer wear, men would be happy with a sobre look. They wouldn’t want to be touted as a fashion braggart.
If we begin slotting men, we can come up with a dozen! In my mind, I lined up most of the men I know, and I realised just how different and yet similar they all are, age no bar! You may try out the same exercise, and I guarantee, with nothing to lose though, that you will agree with my classifications…

Mr Suave
Age: 35 +
Description: Mr Suave rules every girl’s dream. He has a classic sense of dressing, almost impeccable. He likes his shirts without a crease on them, and he won’t step out of his doorstep if his watch, his belt and his shoes don’t match. He prefers the good ol’ colours – black, brown, tan and cream. His shoes will have to be the finest quality leather. His hair will never be out of its place. His face will hardly sport a stubble, except on a really bad day.
Who he could be? A business tycoon, a hotelier, a Hollywood star or Mr Amitabh Bachchan (never mind his french beard!)

Mr Fashionable
Age: No Bar
Description: Mr Fashionable is someone who can be moulded as per the fashion times. If fashion analysts give their verdict – ‘Casual tees with torn jeans’, then Mr Fashionable will be one of the first to sport that. If fashion analysts forecast the next autumn/winter ‘it’ thing to be something unacceptable as ‘cotton sleeveless vests’, Mr Fashionable will stock his wardrobe, and mind you, he’ll carry it off beautifully. His hair, accessories, shoes/sneakers, etc, are subject to fashion trends.
Who he could be? Your guy-next-door, a young restaurateur, a golfer, a royal exponent, Mr Amitabh Bachchan, Shah Rukh Khan…just about anyone.

Mr Wannabe
Age: Below 35
Description: A dreadful copy of Mr Fashionable. The problem with Mr Wannabe is that he lacks confidence, and he believes that ‘fashion’ alone can be a substitute. It’s not for nothing that fashion experts say ‘It’s all about the attitude’.
Who he could be? A crazy fan, a college classmate, a misguided brother, a work associate.

Mr Fixed
Age: No Bar
Description: Mr Fixed can either carry off formals, or casuals. He hardly experiments with a fusion of the two, and rarely does he spend moolah on something that’s out of his scope of fixed dressing. This applies to accessories, shoes, belts, watches, everything.
Who he could be? A retired man, a young businessman, a restaurateur. An actor even.

Mr Cool
Age: 24 – 50 years
Description: Mr Cool is, well, cool. He’s not one to intimately follow fashion trends, he’d rather make his own. If he likes his Superman tee, he’ll wear it. If he likes his ‘jockey’ band peeping out, he’ll make sure it does. Mr Cool has ruffled hair, or gelled spikes; his clothes are well fitted and he has a roving fashion eye. Quite the opposite of Mr Fixed.
Who he could be? A young actor, model, pub owner, phoren-return or phoren-departing lad, a young father, or even a young granddad with an ’18-till-I-die’ spirit…

Mr Overcool
Age: 15 – 24 years
Description: Mr Overcool is naive, but doesn’t think so. He wears his pants almost below his crotch, he shows off the entire jockey, and his clothes NEVER fit well. You won’t catch him alive in anything that’s not baggy. Blame it on the west, or on a distorted fashion sense. Mr Overcool eventually transforms into any of the above.
Who he could be? A just out-of-school boy, a college kid, a just-out-of-college guy.

Mr Doesn’t-Care-A-Damn
Age: 20 – 29 years
Description: Mr Doesn’t-Care-A Damn is in the growing phase. He’s just maturing. In the process, dressing is the last thing he wants to put his mind to. There are bigger and better things in life, you know. So, Mr Doesn’t-Care-A-Damn doesn’t care a damn about what he wears. Shirt out or in, pants loose or tight, colours coordinated or strikingly contrasted – who cares, says Mr Doesn’t-Care-A-Damn. Mention designers, and this mister will ask, ‘Designer who, what?’
Who he could be? A colleague, a student, a traveller.